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DOMESTIC ABUSE SHELTER DEMAND RISES
By EMILY FUGGETTA, Alligator Writer
Tuesday, April 7, 2009 12:25 AM EDT
The demand for domestic abuse shelters in Florida is up by about 40 percent since the recession started, according to a recent state report.
Cpl. Bruce Ferris, a Gainesville Police detective specializing in domestic violence, said that economic hard times result in more domestic violence because people are under financial pressure.
Ferris said that while domestic violence reports are more common among people of a lower socioeconomic status, the problem applies to all economic classes.
“There’s domestic violence happening all over the city, but people with some resources don’t always report to us,” he said. “If your husband is well–known in the community, he’s a big guy at the church, he’s got a job in jeopardy, a lot’s not being reported because you don’t want to ruin his career.”
Marala Scott, who co–authored a book with her husband called “In Our House” about her childhood experience with abuse, said potential abusers are like time bombs, and economic crisis can detonate them at any moment.
“My father had that same stress growing up, and he couldn’t outwardly take out his frustrations at work. He would have lost his job,” she said. “But when he came home, he took out those frustrations on us.”
Scott said another factor is that often the abused is financially tethered to the abuser.
“That’s why Mom stayed. She didn’t think she had any alternative because she couldn’t afford to take care of six children,” she said.
Scott called abuse the silent killer, saying that victims of abuse — men, too, though less common than women — are often reliant on their abusers for economic and emotional stability and don’t stand up for themselves.
“I am not one of those women. I would just not accept it,” she said. “But I got that way by seeing my mother beaten until she was unconscious and her teeth were knocked out and her eyes were black.”
Theresa Harrison, director of Peaceful Paths domestic abuse shelter, said in the past year the organization has seen a radical increase in the number of abuse victims looking for help, especially those who need financial assistance.
“(Abuse) tends to mirror what’s going on in the greater societal picture,” she said. “The reason we’re seeing on a statewide level such a dramatic increase is that this recession has hit people harder than most of the external factors we’ve seen in the last 15 years.”
Harrison said it’s important to realize that stress is not an excuse.
“Ultimately, violent behavior is chosen behavior,” she said. “Despite the millions of people who are being impacted by the recession every day, the majority of them aren’t engaging in violent behavior as a tactic to deal with their stress.” COUPLE STRIVES TO FUND EFFORTS IN RAISING AWARENESS OF ABUSE
By GARTH BISHOP
Published: Tuesday, July 7, 2009 5:00 PM EDT
After telling her own story of abuse in a book that has received national attention, a local woman is now working toward raising money to help people avoid abusive situations.
A fundraising dinner for the prevention of domestic violence will take place at 7 p.m. July 16 at the Aladdin Shrine Center, 3850 Stelzer Road. The project is being spearheaded by Powell residents Marala Scott and Tre Parker as part of their endeavor titled "Help Educate and Alter Lives," or HEAL.
The husband and wife team co-wrote In Our House: Perception vs. Reality, a chronicle of the abuse Scott and her family members suffered at the hands of her father.
Since the book's publication, they have given radio and television interviews and traveled the country to spread the word on how to prevent domestic abuse. Their efforts have caught the attention of many, including Oprah Winfrey, Scott said.
Central Ohio, like most other metropolitan areas, has wonderful shelters and organizations to support victims of abuse, but that's only part of the equation, Scott said.
"You really don't hear enough about how to prevent it," she said. "We pick up the papers and read (about) it, but we don't really value the information that's being shared with us."
Scott often hears questions about how to help people -- particularly young people -- who have found themselves in abusive situations, and just as important as getting them out of those situations is preventing more people from getting into those situations to begin with, she said.
That takes awareness and education in the people around them, she said.
"It's a collective effort by the community," said Scott.
By teaching young people the indicators of abuse, people can be proactive rather than reactive in fighting the problem, Scott said.
A key part of the HEAL effort involves distributing literature on identifying the signs of abusers to high schools, universities and workplaces. Many of the indicators described in the literature are outwardly subtle signs that can hide more sinister tendencies, Scott said.
When individuals are unprepared to deal with abusers, it leaves family and friends wondering "How did this happen?" Scott said. But by making clear to them the precursors to abuse, they can begin to realize when they are in unhealthy relationships, she said.
"We talk about drugs, we talk about sex, but we don't talk about safety as much as we should," she said.
Scott and Parker have been distributing literature and books using their own money since the book was released, sending them not only to schools and universities but to shelters as well. The fundraiser will allow them to distribute the information more widely, Scott said.
In addition to Scott and Parker, speakers at the dinner will include current and former radio hosts who have worked with young people, a Central Ohio teacher who will talk about warning signs that are often overlooked, and a woman from Michigan who has firsthand experience with being in an abusive relationship.
"We want people to walk away and have this message," Scott said. "We want people ... to know how you can protect your kids before they go (away) to school."
Tickets for the dinner are $100 apiece and can be obtained by calling 614-635-5467. Seating is limited, so those interested in attending are encouraged to call early.
More information on HEAL and In Our House can be found online at inourhouse907.blogspot.com.
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SPREADING THE WORD, STOPPING THE VIOLENCE
April 2009
As a domestic violence survivor, I have a story to tell that has hit home for many but is considered unimaginable to others. I am using my story to teach women and men about what I call the “Indicators of an Abuser”.
Community member Marala Scott (center), pictured with singer Tyrese (left), speaks about her experience dealing with domestic violence.
Although college kids go off and live with a melting pot of personalities from all different backgrounds, they don’t know if that handsome guy across the hall has a violent history. I am touring college campuses, shelters and visiting companies across the country to HEAL (Help Educate & Alter Lives) with my story and to share the warning signs.
R&B singer Tyrese Gibson has supported my effort to share my story. The story is so tragic and emotional that it gets everyone’s attention and then I am able to help. To have women grab my hand after I speak and tell me they never knew anyone went through such pain means that we are hiding our stories too often. Silence is deadly and we need to speak out.
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MEMOIR DETAILS STRUGGLE WITH ABUSIVE MEN
Esther Kang
Published: Thursday, April 9, 2009
Updated: Thursday, April 9, 2009
Two months ago, when the Chris Brown and Rihanna scandal flooded the headlines and emerged as the talk of the town, some quickly jumped to take sides with their favorite artist. Others dwelled on the supposed ethical ambiguity of the situation.
But for Columbus, Ohio author Marala Scott, who was invited to a talk show in Seattle to speak about the matter, not a cloud shrouded her clear answer.
“There were men calling in saying that it’s okay to hit a woman if she hits you,” Scott recalled. “But it’s never okay. Violence breeds more violence.”
Upon hearing this said with such certainty and confidence, one can’t help but wonder, with what authority does she say this? Calling it “experience” would be an understatement. “Survival from the depths of hell” is more like it.
Vividly captured in a 366-page memoir titled “In Our House: Perception vs. Reality” are the unfathomable horrors of Scott’s childhood and adolescence dealing with a sadistic, grotesquely violent father and the impact it had on her family. Co-authored with her husband Tré Parker, the memoir, which was released last November, exposes the incredible disparities between what is perceived and what actually occurs behind closed doors, especially in terms of domestic violence.
Scott, who had been successful in the entertainment industry over the past 15 years before becoming a full-time author to promote this cause and tell her story, said many people, including actor/singer Tyrese Gibson, who is an ex-client of 11 years and now spokesperson for this book, had no idea about her dark past.
“For years, I had to hide that pain. So the perception was a complete lie,” Scott said. “All these years, everybody knew me, but no one knew what I went through.”
Her father, Colin, was perceived as handsome, charming and successful. What was unseen, however, was the atrocious physical and verbal abuse he inflicted on his wife, Alley Marie, and their six children. After years of suffering, Alley, desperately and unknowingly, turned to a demonic “church” for solace and the power to protect her kids.
“Every person that has read the book, and that we’ve spoken to, said that the book was absolutely horrifying, but they couldn’t put it down because they had to know what happened,” Scott said. Ironically, she dubbed the intensity of abuse and storyline as told in the book “a one on a scale of one to 10” when compared to the raw account of what had happened.
Having to relive these horrific events of her past, Scott said the writing process of 13 years was psychologically arduous; the bigger picture of promoting awareness about domestic violence, however, gave her an initiative to overlook everything else. If anything, the world needs to hear this story now more than ever, with the stress from the current economic strain causing a hike in abuse rates.
“People need to know that abuse is a cycle,” she said. “But it can be broken. I broke it.”
Despite her initial fear of the public reaction to the raw accounts of her experience, she said the “people were so receptive,” promoting and embracing the book with “grassroot campaigns,” “fireside chats” and more. Also, the unconditional amount of support she received from Parker as well as her son and daughter — a recent Ohio State graduate and a community service-oriented high school student, respectively — helped her power through the process.
“I told my kids, ‘You may lose all your friends when they read this,’” she recalled. “But my son said, ‘I don’t care, this story needs to be told.’ My daughter even got the book into the school library. People are fascinated with the story.”
Upon the release of the memoir, Scott and Parker have been embarking on a book tour to local universities, bookstores and shelters. Along with a second, follow-up book prospectively coming out this winter and talks of a possible film adaptation, an exclusive college campus tour is in the works to reach students across the nation.
“College students and youth are at a point looking for guidance, emotional support and inspiration,” Parker said. “Marala is an inspiration that they can overcome those challenges and become successful even if they were abused. It’s an audience that we could definitely positively influence.”
Soon enough, in today’s society, in which “people find it easier to look the other way,” the authors hope to reform the manner in which the topic of domestic violence is approached.
“It’s easier to hide behind and not say anything, but we want to be there to help and make it not taboo to discuss the abusive situation they are in,” Parker said.
With a wide spectrum of themes, this truthful memoir can potentially be about domestic violence, family, the power of forgiveness or having faith in God — depending on what each individual reader takes away from it.
“This memoir is like an onion; it has so many layers that can help people,” Scott said. “It’s not solely about domestic violence, but it’s the most prevalent message that people have been pulling out. There’s so many Alley Maries out there. There’s so many out there that this memoir can actually speak for.”
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WRITERS USE BOOK TO DISCUSS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Lisa Scott
Issue date: 4/8/09
Domestic violence has been a hot topic since singer Chris Brown was charged with assaulting his girlfriend, Rihanna. Two Columbus authors bring the subject closer to home at 6 p.m. today at Barnes and Noble at the Gateway on North High Street. Husband and wife Tré Parker and Marala Scott will use their book "In Our House: Perception vs. Reality" to discuss domestic violence.
Over a period of 13 years, Scott delved into the hell of suppressed memories, surrendering to the unsettling emotions from her youth to pen the memoir, which was released nationally in November 2008.
"There are always a few unpleasant memories that one cannot endure," she said. "Unfortunately, for me it's my entire childhood."
Telling her story through the eyes of her childhood, Scott leads readers through the tumultuous range of physical and verbal abuse that was her life. From the unrelenting torture stemming from her father's constant attacks to the demonic possession of her mother, Scott does not spare readers from witnessing the harsh reality she endured.
"In Our House" is 366 pages of thought-provoking and intense recollections on the necessity of faith in times of trial. Despite the abuse, neglect and sacrifice that plagued her family, Scott shows how external circumstances, although demoralizing, can work to strengthen faith and satiate the spirit.
"This book will affect anyone with an open mind," Scott said. "Some people will laugh, some will cry and others may be fearful of the things that are revealed, but everyone will leave knowing an important and powerful message."
One such open mind is actor and recording artist Tyrese Gibson.
"This book changed my perspectives on everything," Gibson said in a press release. "After reading this book, it will make you say, 'Well if I thought I was going through some stuff, I haven't been through anything!' "
Playing off the theme, perception vs. reality, Scott reveals how society often turns a blind eye to situations that entail abuse or victimization.
"We live in such a judgmental society. The perception vs. reality issue is that we allow people to see only what we want them to see," Scott said. "We always want to hide the truth because we don't want others to know what we're going through … because we feel people won't care or that our situation isn't worthy to be heard, … but there is no abuse that surpasses another. What I went through is no less than someone being molested, or dealing with drug abuse. Pain is pain, and we need to start acknowledging it."
Scott said the process of writing the book was therapeutic in helping her overcome her own issues.
"Writing this story was not easy for me. If I said everything was all good and fine, it would be a lie," she said. "Growing up, I almost lost my sanity because of the abuse. There were so many things that I had suppressed but I knew I would have to let them go in order to live."
She begins each chapter with a Scripture passage that hints to the forthcoming events in the book.
"People think I always had this strong unwavering faith, but that couldn't be farther from the truth. Back then, I didn't really have it. I was angry at God. My mother believed in him. I believed in him. And we still had to go through this," she said. "But I realized that without God, without that ounce of faith that I held onto, I wouldn't have made it through that situation. You have to have faith."
By sharing her struggles, Scott hopes to show victims that they can achieve greatness, despite the abuse.
As for those she encounters who have yet to find their voice, she offers these words of encouragement:
"How many of you have been abused physically or verbally? How many of you have low self-esteem? You feel like you are no good and no one wants you. And how many afraid to speak up because you're afraid to let the world know the truth about your situation and your pain?" she asked. "I am everyone of you and I hear your story. I am you … and this is not your last stop."
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TALKING ABOUT ABUSE IS GOOD FIRST STEP IN FIGHTING IT
By GARTH BISHOP, COMMENTARY EDITOR
Published: Tuesday, March 24, 2009 2:42 PM EDT
Abuse isn't something I talk about seriously very often.
I'm fortunate enough to have never really had any encounters with it aside from some light bullying in my elementary and middle school years. Those scars healed long ago.
So when I went last week to talk to an author about her memoir chronicling the awful abuse she and her family had endured over the course of years at the hands of her father, I found myself having more trouble than usual thinking of questions.
If the story I wrote on the book -- In Our House: Perception Vs. Reality by Marala Scott and Tre Parker -- isn't in your paper, you can find it on our Web site, columbuslocalnews.com.
Being a journalist means sometimes having ask informed questions about topics on which I am not informed. I have to know something about a road project before I call the Ohio Department of Transportation for more details on it. I have to know something about a case before I start calling lawyers to ask questions about it.
It's a lot harder to research something so rooted in personal experience. But most of the time, I manage. I don't have a lot of personal experience when it comes to tragic death or serious illness, knock on wood, but I can still conduct interviews about them.
This interview was different. And it wasn't until midway through that I figured out why.
I went into the interview with a lot of questions about the writing process, but few about the actual content of the book. I was fortunate in that Scott was very forthcoming with the information; most of the questions I could have asked about that unhappy topic were answered before I had the chance to ask them.
Of the points Scott brought up, one in particular resonated with me more than the others because it explained some of the difficulty I had coming up with questions. It's instinctive, she said, to not want to talk about the abuse one has suffered.
The parent of a dead Marine or a terminally ill child might not enjoy talking about those things, but that parent understands why others might want or need to know.
With abuse, that's not the case, she said. Many people try to deal with it by keeping it all inside.
But that's not the way to deal with it, she said -- if we're to work to curb the problem of domestic abuse, we can't avoid talking about it anymore. One of the things Scott hopes to accomplish with her book is to increase the understanding we, as a society, have about domestic abuse. Eventually, she hopes, we will turn that understanding into a more reliable system of preventing abuse -- making sure people know the signs of it and can get out before it gets worse.
I didn't know what to ask her because I can probably count on one hand the conversations I've had with someone about the abuse they or someone close to them has suffered.
I can't say whether this effort or the next will eventually lead to a significant reduction in domestic and other forms of abuse. But it would be hard to make a case that keeping it all bottled up inside is beneficial for anyone.
Maybe talking about the topics we least want to talk about is the best thing we can do.
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AUTHOR OPENS DOORS TO REVEAL CHILDHOOD FRAUGHT WITH ABUSE
* Powell resident Marala Scott tells her story in an effort to stop abuse before it happens.
By GARTH BISHOP
Published: Friday, March 20, 2009 5:00 PM EDT
Dredging up traumatic memories is painful -- but sometimes it's the best thing we can do.
That's what a Powell resident hopes readers will learn from her memoir of the abuse she witnessed and endured in her younger years.
Marala Scott co-wrote In Our House: Perception Vs. Reality with her husband, Tre Parker. The book, which chronicles the horrific abuse she, her siblings and her mother endured at the hands of her father, took her 13 years to write.
The title of the book comes from the contrast between Scott's home life and its outward appearance. Her father was a successful man, being recruited by the CIA and IBM right out of college despite having five children; all appearances indicated their home life was a happy one, she said.
"We came home, the doors were shut and the abuse was consistent, intense, brutal (and) violent," Scott said.
Parker, too, has seen the effects of abuse in friends and family members.
During much of her career in marketing, Scott hid the horrors of her past from the outside world, as do many other victims of abuse. But that's not the way to stop abuse, Scott said.
"What we need to do is not hide these kinds of stories," she said.
Many accounts of abuse leave certain aspects to the imagination, but In Our House goes into great detail, the vivid memories of those terrible years burned into Scott's mind. Every attack she can remember is described in depth.
"We let you hear the cracks and the blows," she said.
Those descriptions make up an important part of Scott's writing process. It was tough to bring out those memories, she said, and she did most of the writing in stream-of-consciousness format, letting the words flow from her memory banks.
"I took it from memory, and my memory was so vivid," she said.
It was with the help of Parker and her editor she was then able to turn those descriptions into a more cohesive story, Scott said.
The intensely detailed abuse makes up a significant portion of the book, and the explanations of the terrible effects it had on Scott's mother also are presented in full and brutal details. But it is not all horror -- there also are stories of togetherness, of faith, and of Scott's and her family's relationship with God. One early chapter even has some humor.
The book also goes into great depth on the psychology of Scott's father's abuse, at one point referring to her family as his "field experiment."
"Abusers are consistent -- they have a pattern," she said. "It was easy to write -- too easy, really, (and) it's sad -- to write what I saw."
Scott said she hopes that insight will help readers identify the early signs of abuse so they can stop it before it gets worse.
"We help (victims) after the fact, but wouldn't it be great if we could help them before?" Scott said.
It took Scott a long time to come to grips with her past and forgive her father for what he did to her and the rest of her family -- the abuse occurred when she was between the ages of 8 and 13, and she is now 45 -- but it was something that needed to happen, she said.
Since it was released last fall, the book has garnered notice for Scott and Parker. They have been called to radio shows to speak as authorities on abuse -- particularly following the recent Chris Brown-Rihanna situation -- and the book has been promoted heavily by musician and actor Tyrese Gibson, a close friend of Scott's.
The authors are even looking turning the book into a movie.
In Our House can be found in local Barnes & Noble stores and also can be ordered online via barnesandnoble.com, amazon.com and the book's Web site, inourhousebook.com. The authors' blog can be found at inourhouse907.blogspot.com.
The authors have two local book signings coming up. The first is from 6 to 8 p.m. April 8 at the Barnes & Noble store on the Ohio State University campus, 1598 N. High St.; the second is 3 to 5 p.m. April 11 at Borders, 4545 Kenny Road.
Scott and Parker also plan to hold an event in downtown Columbus in early July to raise awareness of domestic violence, though the date and location have not yet been finalized.
Those interested in joining the cause to combat and bring awareness to abuse and domestic violence can contact the authors via their Web site or by contacting their publicist, David Estep, via e-mail at
This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
or via phone at 614-635-5467.
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IN OUR HOUSE
COLUMBUS AUTHORS JOIN TOGETHER FOR POWERFUL BOOK
Columbus Authors Marala Scott and Tré Parker have written a powerful and gripping book titled In Our House, Perception vs. Reality, which chronicles the memoir about domestic violence and how it affects a family.
The setting of this memoir takes place in a small city outside of Cleveland. Scott provides vivid recollections of her childhood experiences with domestic violence, and provides analytical perspectives as an adult.
The book's subject, Collin, is a brilliant, handsome and charming man to the outside world, recruited by both the CIA and IBM. The reality was a hellish nightmare of verbal and atrocious physical abuse for Alley, his beautiful wife, and their six children. Alley feels helpless to protect her children from Colin's constant attacks when three mysterious women visit her and promise he will never hurt them again - if she gives them what they want.
This horror-filled story between Colin's appetite for abuse versus Alley's fight against the domestic violence destroying her family was written to expose the reality of domestic violence and provide answers on how to avoid a similar situation.
The book is available for sale at Barnes & Noble and at www.amazon.com. Scott and Parker are currently touring the area with speaking engagements, and will embark upon a national college tour in the spring.
In Our House was published by Seraph Books, LLC, in Columbus. For more information, visit www.inourhouseat907.com/.
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FIGHTING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Abuse survivor to speak with students
Lauren Bjerk / For The South End
Published: Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Most people do not like talking about domestic violence. During the aftermath of the Chris Brown/Rihanna abuse issue, celebrities were justifying Brown’s actions by saying he — the person least harmed in the scuffle — was young.
These same celebrities quickly retracted their statements, saying they were not aware of all the facts, a common occurrence in abuse cases.
However, on March 5, Wayne State will hold a discussion in the Bernath Auditorium with one author who is not afraid to talk about domestic violence, or simply put, her past.
Marala Scott lived in a world of violence at a very young age. In her memoir, “In Our House,” co-authored with her husband Tre Parker, she wrote about her dark past and how she was able to forgive her abusive father.
There’s a line in the memoir that reads, “Let God deal with him, He made him.”
“If you let it go, you have more room to live and breathe,” Scott said.
Although the book has not been on the shelves long, the text was 13 years in the making.
“It was somewhat difficult to get the book from a rough draft to a finished project,” Parker said.
“I helped bring the book to a finished project, be there emotionally and just help the book flow a little better.”
In the memoir, Scott reflected on her past, the tragic difficulties her mother had to face and the grave differences between perception and reality.
Scott hails from Ohio and went to Eastern Michigan University in an effort to be close to her mother, who left the abusive household and moved to Southwest Detroit.
“I ran track and I was offered many scholarships, but I took one in Michigan so I could be close to my mom and see her on the weekends,” Scott said. “We weren’t allowed to see my mother when I lived with my dad, so I went to school in Michigan to be near her.”
Scott said her faith in God and her ability to let go helped her through her dark past.
“I always kept in touch with him, but I couldn’t stay for more than a few hours at a time,” she said, referring to her relationship with her father.
“If he brought up mom, I’d say ‘I got to leave.’
“People have to realize you have to forgive; forgiveness is freedom. You may never forget. I obviously have never forgotten, but I’m free from the pain.”
Scott said she wrote the book to show what her mother went through, and to help other people.
In addition to a discussion in Bernath Auditorium, Scott and Parker will be hosting a book signing at the Barnes and Noble near campus the same day.
Although the two authors will only be here one day, they hope their message stays with WSU students and anyone who reads their book.
“The big message is going to be prevention of [abuse],” Scott said. “We’re going to talk about how many indicators are present before it gets to physical violence. You look at Rihanna and Chris Brown, it’s all around us.”
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BUZZINE MAGAZINE
By: Parimal M. Rohit
Bollywood Editor
Hollywood Correspondent
If you look into my house, you will see one of two things: perception or reality. If I look into your house, I, too, will see one of two things: perception or reality.
Every so often, someone is warm enough to invite you into their home and show you both things –- perception and reality.
That warm person is Marala Scott who, with Tre Parker, invites us into her home in the form of a memoir entitled In Our House: Perception vs. Reality.
“I believe that the pain we suffer as children will carry into the adult lives of our children if we choose to let it,” Scott said about her youth which served as a basis for the memoir. “It was challenging to write this. It’s riveting, gripping, and horrific.”
Released on November 1, 2008, Scott’s memoir was 13 years in the making.
In Our House tells a story of Collin, a brilliant, handsome, and charming man to the outside world, recruited by both the CIA and IBM. The perception was that he had it all.
However, behind closed doors, Collin’s reality was a hellish nightmare of verbal and atrocious physical abuse toward Alley and their six children.
Published by Seraph Books and co-written by Tre Parker, In Our House: Perception vs. Reality is a vivid recollection of Scott’s “horrific” childhood. With the help of Parker, Scott tells her story from the perspective of her childhood while also providing analytical perspectives as an adult.
“We didn’t want to just tell a story,” Scott told Buzzine. “We wanted the reader to feel the story. We took the account of the actual abuse and told it in this memoir.”
Since the book’s release more than ten weeks ago, one of Hollywood’s favorite stars helped promote the book -– Tyrese Gibson.
“This book changed my perspectives on everything,” Gibson said after he read the memoir. “It changed my life forever.”
Gibson has been promoting the book everywhere, even at the red carpet of his 30th birthday party in December.
“(Scott) is an amazing person, and her book is a very powerful tale everyone should read,” Gibson added.
Gibson agreed with Scott and Parker that the purpose of the memoir is to educate people about abusive households. According to Parker, abuse is a lot more prevalent than people realize.
“It’s a situation everyone can relate to,” he told Buzzine. “Abuse doesn’t discriminate. Abuse is more than just a word. We wanted the reader to feel it.”
In addition to relaying the negative power of abuse and the impact it has on everyone involved, Scott and Parker have been speaking at numerous engagements while also relying upon Hollywood A-listers such as Tyrese to raise awareness about domestic violence to the masses.
“We have powers to stabilize the community,” Parker said about using every possible means, including the entertainment business, to spread the word about important social issues such as domestic violence. “If you speak up and use your voice, it’s a powerful tool. Outlets to get help do exist.”
Yet, for Scott, she hopes to do more than just getting the word about domestic violence and abuse. She wants to do more than challenge perceptions. Instead, Scott wants people to learn how to accept the reality of abuse, and how to move on in a positive manner.
“I could have chosen to put myself in that situation,” Scott said about growing up with an abusive parent, and how she vowed to never be the same to her children. “I told myself I would never hurt my kids.”
As a result, while In Our House focuses on life during an abusive relationship, she plans to write a second book dealing with life after abuse.
“It’s kind of the story of what happens to children of abuse,” Scott said. “I’m living proof that you only hold on to pain if you choose to. It doesn’t have to follow you.”
Throughout the story, both current and planned, Parker added that forgiveness is a major factor.
“The idea of how you forgive keeps coming up,” he said. “Oftentimes, we don’t want to (forgive), but until you do, it’s very hard to move on.”
Yet, with the help of Parker, Scott has managed to forgive and move on, and is now living a peaceful life in Columbus, Ohio. Scott added she has an amazing relationship with her two children, both young adults now.
Through her experience, Scott hopes to inspire and empower. By exposing the realities of her childhood, Scott hopes others will avoid living a similar life. As we all live in our respective houses, she hopes we all actually do live a life of peace instead of giving the perception that we do.
In Our House: Perception vs. Reality is currently on sale. For more information, visit www.inourhousebook.com.
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GLEAM MAGAZINE EXCLUSIVE:
This is the first of the many book reviews to come. Gleam Magazine was fortunate enough to bring you an exclusive in depth interview with Author Marala Scott and co-author Tre Parker of the highly anticipated memoir In our house.
In our house far surpasses the quintessential descriptive words commonly used to review a memoir. Nonetheless, Marala Scott has blazed a trail of her own by quickly establishing an extreme following of people who are ready to experience something real. By contrasting perception vs. reality, and confronting abuse, neglect and emotional distress Marala takes you on a journey through her childhood eyes, which witnessed abuse in every form, along with witnessing the effects of a demonically possessed parent. “For starters this is indeed and extremely emotional book, but there are a series of emotions you’ll feel when you read this book, you will laugh and cry” Marala says.
“I came from a very affluent African American family, and to people from the outside looking in would think that at home everything was fine, but in reality there were some horrific problems behind our walls.” says Marala. Traditionally, memoirs usually deal with public matters, rather than personal, and contain little or no information about the writer, and are almost entirely concerned with other people. Recognizing how important it was to get a story like this out to the world to read; Marala pushed her inhibitions to the side and pulls readers into her world through her eyes as a child experiencing things that a child should never see, but sadly many children live on a daily basis.
“The memories that I have of the terrible events that took place in my home growing up are to this day very vivid, there were times when I literally would type with my eyes shut” says Marala. “It was streams of consciousness’ coming out –my emotions were so high, but writing and getting it all out was very therapeutic for me.” she states “Think about the girl that is being abused but keeps a smile on her face everyday at school to hide behind, or the married couples driving expensive cars and live lavish lifestyles, but can’t afford to pay their mortgage. The perception vs. reality issue is that we allow people to see only what we want them to see.” Marala states.
“We need to stop hiding behind what we want people to see, and learn how to confront these kinds of family issues, but you can never address it if u don’t acknowledge it.” Quickly establishing a core audience before the book is released, Marala has a strong team and support system behind her including her husband Tre’ Parker who is also the co-author of the memoir. “My Husband kept suggesting that I do the memoir; he had experienced a few similar things that I’d experienced in his family when he was growing up so he understood the significance of getting a story like this published. Marala combines a gripping personal story with practical ways to deal with the aftermath of a troubling childhood and shows readers of all ages and backgrounds how to transform the demons of self-doubt and stagnation into positive, winning energy.
One suitable descriptive word to embody the premise of the memoir would have to be “gripping” in Marala’s opinion “There were times when I had to put the book down and take a breather and come back to it because there were chapters that I just had to get out.” Marala explains. You really don’t see me but you feel me, by the fourth chapter something major happens and that’s when the horror begins, I’ve had people who’ve said that they can’t read it at night, or have to stop and read their bible afterward.” In our house is 367 pages of life impacting material, serving as a definite a page-turner it’s just something that you’ve never experienced. The excitement behind the book has caused a major buzz within the internet blog community as well. You can read reviews on Essence Magazine’s blog, The Tyra show, and even watch a Youtube webcast.
“I think this story shows the power of God, tragedy is tragedy and abuse has no age, race or religion; it can happen to anyone.” Explains Marala. One thing that Marala has noticed is that a number of African American families don’t like to get counseling for family problems. “I believe once someone reads my story, if they have witnessed or experienced abuse but never dealt with it; they will finally be able to work towards dealing with the effects it may have caused them. Even with the extreme amount of excitement surrounding the memoir, Marala and Tre’s eyes sand hearts are set on using the book as a catalyst to touch as many lives as they can through this story. “We plan on starting a foundation dealing with raising awareness about in home abuse. Our vision for this memoir is for people to begin to look at the big picture, and to realize that God has the ultimate power.” We want people to challenge themselves to examine their own lives, and once they’ve established what’s important to them to reach toward the greatness that God has for them.”
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